Okay, first off, to anyone who owns a personal garden, I mean no diss on you. I’m sure your garden is beautiful and that you’ve done a wonderful job of maintaining it. I myself have a little dream of growing my own herb garden, brewing my own loose leaf teas along with what I grow, and having a dandy lil time with it. But, I don’t even know where to start on growing it, let alone maintaining it. Luckily, I have some friends who understand how to healthily grow plants and things of that nature, and I’ve seen their plants and how gorgeous they look as a result of the care they’ve put into them. I have to go to stores to buy seeds in order to even plant these plants. But, where are the best places to go? Is there a mom & pop shop nearby I should hit up? Then, where is the best spot in my yard to cultivate the garden? What about soil? Mulch? (I almost said water but I’m pretty confident in my ability to get some) Harvesting? Uprooting? Disposing? There are so many processes that go into this that seem so simple at face value, but unfortunately, I don’t think my hours in Stardew Valley will help me out on this. But hey, one way or another, I’ll learn how to do it all and end up with a gorgeous garden to call my own. Yep. My own garden. All mine.
But what about the friends who told me where to buy seeds? The people who sold me the seeds? The people that cultivated the seeds to sell? The people who taught me to handle soil and mulch? Those who taught me about harvest and disposal? Sure, the garden is mine, I own it and maintain it. But there are so many other people that played instrumental parts in me learning how to handle a garden, as well as obtaining necessary items for the garden. I couldn’t have learned ANY of that alone. I couldn’t just conjure up the knowledge for it out of thin air and then funnel it into my brain. That would be mad convenient, but that’s a power I’d rather not have to trust myself with. We can’t grow gardens alone. If you haven’t predicted it yet, gardens are an allegory for life, relationships, etc. I’ve learned this before in my life, and now I’m learning it again. I haven’t intentionally isolated myself or intentionally driven others away, yet, I still accomplished those actions. People I love have felt pushed away from me as of late, and I’ve been called out for acting selfishly. Not my intention, sure. But I’m also learning that in these times, my intentions need to take a back seat and allow humility to take the driver’s spot. Sitting down and looking your mistakes in the face sucks. They are ugly, they are uncomfortable, and they are exhausting. Among those things, they are also necessary. Because when we look at them long enough to understand them, our mistakes eventually stop being mistakes, and they turn into lessons. But we can’t stop there. Lessons have to be learned, understood, and taken into heart. When we accept them to that degree, then the garden blossoms. We start to see the better in ourselves, and we can learn how to achieve being our better selves. Allow me to discuss this further in divided paragraphs, because those are neat and organized.
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GARDENERS
Good gardeners can determine themselves when a plant needs uprooted, they can tell when a plant has yielded all it can, or when it’s reached the end of it’s life. They also know what weeds need to be removed in order to promote the healthy growth of good plants. Find. Friends. Who. Do. This. For. You. Surround yourself with people that can, in grace and love, discuss things they’ve noticed in you that seems out of character, or things that’ve been hurtful from you. And accept their words! I’m not saying you need a weekly examination, or that you need to allow yourself to be judged endlessly, but allow yourself to accept the words of friends who truly love you. At the end of the day, those who love you won’t just speak words, they will speak their feelings, their concerns, and their desire to see you be the best you you can be. Not so they can be spared of you, but because they love you and they don’t want you to cheat yourself out of you. They will open up from a place of love, and not one of anger. Anger is like a giant boot, ready to come and stomp plants down, never allowing them to grow and reach for the sun. Surround yourself with gardeners, not…boots, I guess?
LEARN HOW TO GARDEN
Imagine, your garden is growing and flourishing, thanks to the advice you’ve received on how to properly cultivate and maintain the whole thing. Feels good, doesn’t it? Well, great! But, there’s one thing. Have you taken the skills you’ve learned to heart, ready to use them next time on your own? Or will you grow reliant on the gardening talents of others? At some point, it ends up in everybody’s best interest that you take what you’ve learned, and move forward on your own with your knowledge. Imagine being a gardener for years, but every time you go to plant something, you go bug the same people over and over every single time you go to plant something. Like, haven’t you been at this for awhile now? Haven’t you heard all of these tips before? Don’t you want your own style of gardening? If you grow dependent on advice and help from others, you can’t really grow. You become overly dependent on others, meanwhile they’re just gardeners doing their best, much like you. You can’t depend on them for every bit of knowledge necessary to get by. You need to learn what they’ve told you, take it in and process it. After awhile, use that knowledge, and develop yourself. Develop your own individualistic personality, and find new ways to do things that best suit you. Then, watch your garden become your own, growing in a way and organized in a style that fulfills you. It isn’t a carbon copy of someone else’s garden, it’s your own.
At the end of the day, we can break down our character on influences we’ve been fed by throughout our lives. Hopefully, you’ve taken them and squeezed out the parts you liked, then morphed them into the rest of you. We are a culmination of advice, aesthetics, opinions, and experiences. We weren’t built to just blend in and go with what we see, what we hear. We will be told that we aren’t growing correctly, some people will look down on your style, your way of doing things. But ultimately, you know what’s up. You know what works the best for you. And why let the opinion of someone who is just as temporary, just as flawed, just as capable of good and evil as you are? Let those words blow away on the wind and celebrate what you’ve accomplished, and work towards that bright and shiny future, friend. Blessings! Much love! Toodle loo!
Look at this doof. Anyways, I’m happy you’ve made it to the end of this post, MISERABLY overdue might I add. Life is wack, wild even, and unfortunately, an utter lack of motivation has seeped into aspects of my creative life. But here we are! I’m not done writing! In fact, I’ve been accepted into Full Sail University to pursue a creative writing degree :):):):):) I’ll be starting next January and I’m stoked to see how that improves my skills. Also! I want to start posting poetry here! That way I can provide more than just these long-winded personal essays and what-not. Expect that soon! And again, thank you for reading, you beautiful person you. Go forth in excellence! Take the day by storm! I can snap my fingers but only with my pinky finger on both hands! Ciao!